Though not specific to my photography, clients or even people I know these are things that this year has taught me. So many things have been appropriately unfolded in my life, some have not, but I feel like a lot of this list {longer list than the one I posted on my Facebook account} are things we all learn eventually in life. Take it or leave it, it is simply my interpretation, advice or education on life itself.
1. We're our own worst enemies. I mean that because no one else looks at you with such a fine comb and a magnifying mirror like you do. I doubt our boyfriends or husbands {or partners} have been as close to our faces to examine us as when we press our faces up to the mirror in the morning and judge ourselves.
2. People are going to do whatever they want....don't make it your problem when they fight on the opposing side, hurt your feelings and try to slander you. They didn't and don't care enough about you to protect your feelings so stop protecting theirs!
3. Give respect, get respect and the same goes for love. This one is self-explanatory.
4. Don't underestimate yourself or others... When you don't give yourself or others enough credit, someone is always falling short...that's not fair to anyone.
5. Look after you. Make sure you're okay in a situation before you look after others...u can't do that properly half helped.
6. Just live. Be yourself, love, and enjoy life! Those who hurt you want you to suffer, don't give in :)
*******The original Facebook list ends after #6 but I'm continuing it in my blog today...********
7. {Don't settle} I've learned that settling isn't fair to anyone. It makes people think you're entirely okay with a situation, and it forces you to accept the situation as is. No one wants that! If people love you, and I promise you there ARE people who do {whoever you are reading this}, then they are not going to shut you out is you're honest. They may even say, I'm glad you finally told me! People can tell when you're not comfortable with a situation, so stop acting like you are!
8. {DREAM BIG} I would have gotten nothing in life without going for it. I used to be that girl who was TOO realistic. I constantly told myself "In a million years" to just about everything...but the problem with this is that life isn't ordinary, predictable, or planned. Life will surprise you if you let it! I proposed to my husband (hello, 21st century). I applied to different schools that I was almost certain I'd never attend, and went to a highly-esteemed University in Ontario for three years where I learned my calling in life. I took a risk and started my own company at the age of 17 (and it's expanding!). I now have plans for kids with my husband when I thought we'd be waiting YEARS before we tried....after our puppy adventure of course. There's no such thing as dreaming too big. So do it. Dream.
9. {APPRECIATE JOBS} Your current job may not be your dream career. You may have to: clean up puke, wipe a few bums, pick some rocks,have toys thrown at you, get bitten, be a cashier, you name it (those are a few tings I've done to get by)....before you get the dream. But don't ever be afraid to admit you're proud of having a job that may not be ideal. People harder done by than you would kill to have the job you complain about. Yes, when someone says something cruel to you if you work customer service, when you have to clean up barf, or even yes--clean bums for a living at least you're working! Don't ever be ashamed of making an honest living. Just the fact that you have a job, makes you extremely fortunate compared to some.
10. {Don't be afraid to STAND UP for your beliefs} No, I don't mean that you believe you're entitled to a bank's money so hold one at gunpoint, or please no religious sacrifices etc... What I mean to say is, if something you truly believe in is being mocked, don't be afraid to say "I believe in that, and I don't appreciate that". I've had to stick up for myself a few times in 2013 where I was ill to my stomach and shakingly afraid to do so, but I'm glad I did! I'm going to put my own beliefs as an example for a second but hear me out anyways... Jesus didn't kill people, shove brochures in people's faces, or give unwarranted opinion, he spoke his mind respectfully. Saying "I do not agree", "I will not be part of this", or "I think this is wrong" is not being unkind, it is being mindful of yourself.
11. {Parents aren't always right, but they're to be respected} Calling your mom or dad a name, ignoring them or lashing out isn't being respectful. You may not agree with them, but they damn-well deserve more courtesy than that. It wasn't you who had hours of labor to push a self-righteous boy or girl out of you, was it? It wasn't you who paid for medical expenses, clothes, food, shelter, education....you name it so that you could be successful in life! It wasn't you who gave up weekends to parent, or worked 11 hour days to make you comfortable. No, parents aren't ALWAYS right, but they ALWAYS deserve your respect. They're human, they will and don't mean to make mistakes... I'm sure you've experienced a cringe moment in your life too. But, if they didn't beat your ass blue, starve you, demean every fiber of your being, neglect you or kill you then you best believe they cared!
12. {Friends are not disposable} If you know me, which if you're reading this I'm sure you do, you know that I'm not one to give up on people easily. Unless your friend is being detrimental to your health, or completely non-existent in your life, they're human...give them a break! For the friends I have let go, they were repeat offenders of a detrimental thing in my life or I forgot about their existence after such a long break of not hearing from them. But I have had spats with many of my friends and we're still good! Friends should be able to have disagreements with you because you're different and no two people think exactly alike. Let them have your moment as I'm sure someone else has given you that courtesy before and ask them to catch up when they're calm.
These are the hard lessons I've learned the past year (2013). I hope that by sharing, you don't have to learn them the hard way too. Take care, loves! xoxoxo
-Jess
